I think you gotta 'feel the love' regardless of brand. For that price I would not accept crunchy and stained. I use totsbots everyday and I tumble them everyday (no ill effect noticed here), mine are certainly not crunchy I would never sell them in that condition unless described fully that way and compensated for with a very low price. I especially hate stained nappies and would not accept them if I hadn't been aware of it (it's difficult to avoid I know).
I think you are right to send them back and use the money on some in better condition (if thats what you decide to do)
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