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No long post tonight, I just want to remember how life can remind you of just how serious your problems are with one little episode. OH blacked out twice today and so we are all reminded today of just how serious everything is, this is cancer, it is real and it is serious and despite how well it has all gone up to now maybe we should all be a bit more cautious about what we are dealing with.
On an upnote (and, yes, even on a crap day like today there can be an upnote) I think we may have found the...

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I've decided to start a wish list for things I would like for this baby / me although quite a few may remain just that....a wish!

BF bracelet
Amber teething necklace
A scrummy baby blanket
A sling for when too heavy for my stretchy close carrier
Wool soakers - have 2 but one more would be good!
Wool dungees / romper
More medium size nappies - think these can wait!
Sleep gowns
Easy-fit car seat to replace my old belt in one!
Change mat...

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Before the plan settling took from 7pm til 10pm or until i gave in and got inbed with isobella. She would not sleep in her cot. Nighttime wakings were upto every hour so started the no cry sleep solution on Monday coupled with changing her cot to a toddler bed.

MONDAY

Nap log
Not a usual day due to long car journey
9.30 fell asleep, by car movement,in the car,and stayed asleep for the journey for 3 hours
3pm fell asleep travelling back by car movement,in the car,and stayed asleep for 1 hour

prebedtime...

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I had forgotten I had this little corner, I'm glad I found it though as today I just need a bit of space to let off steam.
Today I'm tired; physically and mentally and emotionally. It's days like this that I question my own sanity at adding to our family, whether we are doing the right thing, for everyone. How will the older 2 cope? Will I cope? Will J? Or have I just lost the plot and this is going to be a really stupid thing to do?
I don't regret this baby, he is not now and will never be a mistake...

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my girly

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