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Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

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mummy_goose1
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Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby mummy_goose1 » Fri May 18, 2012 1:36 pm

Hayley has always been quite 'head strong'... takes after me apparently... :lookround:
recently, she has started having major temper tantrums... over tiny things... not these i can cope with, but today she has thrown things in temper.,.. and my little girl has brilliant aim... :roll:
SO she threw a wooden duck at dan this morning because he told her no. It really hurt him, and he lost his temper and shouted at her loudly, and really scared her.
I know she is just starting to learn her own mind, and it's development related, and i know she didnt intend to hurt her dad... but she definitely intended to hit him... and that's not on! lol.
so i suppose i'm just after suggestions on how to deal with it....
i try to model behaviour.. so i try not to get angry, and just matter of factly tell her that we don't throw our toys/hit mummy etc... and put her down/ignore the tantrums. am just worried she'll start throwing stuff at other children... and really hurt someone... :-?

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cath
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby cath » Fri May 18, 2012 7:43 pm

I will be stalking this thread hoping you get some answers because at 28 months, Charlotte still does stuff like this. Like your LO, she is very headstrong & if something doesn't go her way, she lashes out & either throws something or hits/bites/scratches me (rarely DH though, it's mainly me she goes for.) I have been trying to deal with it by walking away from her & refusing to play with her until she says sorry or kisses me better and she does tend to come over & kiss me better of her own acord now but it doesn't stop her doing it again the next time. I have also been waiting for her to calm down & then telling her that it is ok for her to be upset but it is not ok for her to hurt people. I'm hoping it starts to sink in soon, I am covered in scratches & bruises!

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Miss_Purple
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby Miss_Purple » Fri May 18, 2012 10:40 pm

I'll also be watching this thread as my 31 month old is starting to push/hit/throw things too.

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bekhi1983
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby bekhi1983 » Sat May 19, 2012 1:09 am

I'll be watching this thread too, Callum's started young :evil: So far I tell him no, take whatever he throws off him, then try to ignore him untill he calms down. I've started to praise him more when he is behaving to try to create positive reinforcement.

It's completely new territory for me, Aidan never was nor still is violent. I think Callum's making up for it. Callum's still too young to understand the naughty step which was really useful for Aidan. I'm thinking a reward chart might come in useful, one where points can be earnt and taken away.

Tonight he threw his tea on the floor as we took his juice off him as he was trying to pour it on his dads tea. This morning he grabbed my plate of toast and threw that breaking the plate, as he wanted mine and not his and I'd told him no. He likes to have his own way and he's now at an age where we have to put our foot down, I'm hoping it doesn't take too long for him to cotton on that he can't always have his own way . It's our own fault for spoiling him up till now.

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mummy_goose1
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby mummy_goose1 » Sat May 19, 2012 5:24 pm

So glad it's not just me!!
come on then - someone out there must have some advice!!! xx

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mummy_goose1
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby mummy_goose1 » Tue May 22, 2012 7:00 pm

ok... so today we have had at least 3 absolute meltdowns... if i can't distract her immediately then she absolute;y goes to pieces... and she doesnt want me to touch her or interact with her in any way... she just shouts., shrieks, cries, sobs.... throws, hits... its bloody awful :cry:
eventually when i think she is a bit less cross i pick her up, and then she just cries, and eventually calms down.
why is she doing this??? what am i doing wrong?? :cry: :cry:

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Johanna21
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby Johanna21 » Tue May 22, 2012 8:26 pm

I've been watching this thread in the hope of some magic solution but I think I'm just going to have to share my woes instead :( My dd didn't really do the terrible 2s, she talked well so I don't think she got frustrated enough for tantrums. Ds was born 3 days after her 2nd birthday so we had quite a bit of attention seeking behaviour but I expected that. She's now 37 months and the last 2 or 3 months have been pretty rough. She deliberately knocks things on the floor or throws stuff about - she chooses things which will make the most mess. I think it's the thought she puts into it that gets me, she's not just lashing out but actually looking for what will cause the most mess / upset. When we ask her why she's behaving like this she says things like "I like making people cross"!

Any suggestions? I was thinking of trying a reward chart so there's something visual to remind her of the benefits of good behaviour when she's first starting to kick off and a clear consequence for unpleasant behaviour. Does anybody use a reward chart?

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teganplus2
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby teganplus2 » Tue May 22, 2012 8:54 pm

@mummy_goose, hush your jibber jabbber! You aren't doing anything wrong, I have three of them all with completely different temperaments, Jax's temper tantrums are EPIC and have been for at least two months, maybe linger, he hits, throws, screams, stamps, throws himself onto the floor, it really is a sight to behold from such a tiny dude!!

My solution??? Complete and utter ignorance of any bad behaviour, I just pretend it's not happening, play with the other two and wait for him to come around on his own accord and he is starting to give in and come round quicker and quicker

Sending :hug: :hug: they can be very stubborn little monkey's and never fail to surprise me with their tempers :giggle:

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sophie90
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Re: Temper tantrum and moody toddler.

Postby sophie90 » Wed May 23, 2012 6:59 am

Zach and Leo both have horrendous tempers, Zach hits/bites/scratches anything that will hurt people seems to make him less angry :( He also swears and headbutts (I try not to swear around him but have had the occasional slip and I think this is were he has picked the swearing up from :oops: ) Zach will also hold his breath in an attempt to get what he wants, or if he is told 'No' will ignore me completely and do it anyway!
Leo isn't even one yet, so being firm with him is difficult as he doesn't really understand but is at the age where he needs to start learning that it's not ok, he throws himself backwards when he is told 'No' or screams until he is blue in the face :(
Such angry little boys!
We tried the naughty step with Zach and he just didnt get it (infact to be quite honest he lay lengthways across the step and started shouting that he was dead and mummy had done it) Leo is too young for the naughty step, ignoring the tantrums gets me attacked, not really sure what other route to take!!

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