hf1

Why.?

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epsilon1
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Why.?

Postby epsilon1 » Tue Sep 22, 2015 6:46 pm

Is it OK for people to be so dogmatic about parenting decisions in a way it's not about most other topics?

Earlier I had my next door neighbour tell me that she found it 'gross' that I was still feeding Junior (2 plus 9 months), and that he should have stopped that by the age of 1. I mentioned the UN recommendation and then made noises about all babies and children being difficult in different ways. She's generally very nice, so I wasn't going to argue, and obv she's entitled to her opinion and I wouldn't expect most people to know the current guidelines / recommendation etc, but how is it socially acceptable to SAY things like that?

(Context, she has looked after the baby on several occasions during Junior's bedtime when Mr ep has been working away and said nothing about this - I really am not complaining about her in particular at all).

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clothmama
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Re: Why.?

Postby clothmama » Tue Sep 22, 2015 6:59 pm

I don't know but know exactly what you mean!

Perhaps it is that it is such an emotionally charged subject? We all carry emotions from our own childhoods, positive and / or negative and our own parenting decisions that we have made or wish in hindsight that we had made! I know I beat myself up about 'only' feeding Josh for 1 year as I fed Louis for 2.5, but at the time 1 year seemed a very long time and French people that knew were quite surprised! Culturally there has been such negative issues surrounding BF since formula got popular that sadly some people do still hold on to them even if they may not realise it or consciously do it.

I think you did the right thing with your answer quoting the WHO guidelines :D Try not to let it effect your relationship with her, some peeps just aren't comfortable with extended BF :hug:

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Re: Why.?

Postby cuppachaplz » Tue Sep 22, 2015 8:42 pm

No idea, but I'm really not enjoying how much everyone pushes for the cessation of breastfeeding.
I'm already getting 'isn't he a little old for that' comments about Percy. He is 9m but looks far younger owing to size and developmental delays.

When I had j, 12m appeared to be the thing to aim for, with anything additional being considered a pat on the back/extra benefit thing. I fed him until 11m, and he had ebf until just shy of 1.
Percy will only take a bottle if he's desperate, and still only minimal amounts; he'd rather hold out until I'm home, so the idea of stopping terrifies me, and yet I'm still being advices to discourage feeds :(

It feels to me as though even health professionals feel that 6m is enough, despite the WHO guidelines.

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Re: Why.?

Postby Dancing mum » Wed Sep 23, 2015 11:25 pm

I think it sounds like you handled it really well :thumbsup:
I don't know but have come up against similar criticism as well. My LO is 18m and I regularly get comments from friends (one of whom is a paediatric nurse) and family, anything from 'when do I plan on stopping?' to 'it seems weird / wrong at this age', 'she doesn't need it anymore ', 'rod for my own back'... etc! I recently even had a health visitor start giving me advice on how to 'get her off the breast' despite saying I was happy to continue bf.
I fully accept that everyone has their own opinions on bringing up children but i don't understand why it bothers people so much that I'm making different decisions to them, I'm not passing judgement on them so just 'live and let live'!


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