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Tantrums

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beck
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Tantrums

Postby beck » Sat Feb 10, 2007 3:07 am

I'm having a few problems with Hannah and Tantrums, how does everyone else deal with them?

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clothmama
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Postby clothmama » Sat Feb 10, 2007 6:46 am

My sympathy is with you, not an easy time at all!!!!

Unfortunately not much works when they really get goiing I seem to remember. I think ignoring it, ie leave the room as long as she is safe, there isn't much point having a paddy if noones watching is there :lol: ?

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lilylover
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Postby lilylover » Mon Feb 26, 2007 9:39 am

I know Lil is only so young (one tommorow) but though I would agree with Tory. At the moment she is liking throwing herself on the floor to cry and it seems the more I ignore her the quicker she seems to stop. Sometimes she will stop crying and crawl to where I am then start again, lol :lol: !

Sam...

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Shevi
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Postby Shevi » Wed May 16, 2007 8:41 am

i'm a really mean mummy when it comes to tantrums.
Taneli is bigger now, so i can explain that he has got up to the count of 5 or he is going for 'quiet time', generally by the count of 5 he is quiet again...if not, we do this 1 more time and then its too his room to sit on the chair in there with no toys and the door closed.
when he was littler, 'time outs' did work, but warning was more difficult as they have no concept of time. we used to have 1 song (could have been twinkle twinkle) and he knew that if he was stil shouting by the end of the song he would be left by himself with no toys till he would be good.

the most important thing is consistancy, so your sprog knows exactly what they can and cannot get away with....but of course, if you think your bubs isn't feeling well, or is very over tired, the time outs where you hold them cuddled so they stop thrashing about, but dont look them in the eye can be a much better option.

Shevi

ps. we never found the 'naughty step' useful as Taneli thought it was hysterical! and he stopped the tantrum but sat on the stairs jumping on and off the 'naughty step' with glee ('i'm on the naughty step! i'm off the naughty step! mummy? why was the step naughty!!??')
i could never get himt o stay in the coner either, but carriing him upstairs and sitting him on the chair and closing the door...and reposistioning him on the chair when he tried to escape (til he said he was goingt o be a good boy...and apologised for what he did wrong) seemed to do the trick.

pps. although these methods worked great for us...the have not worked for my friend little girl...tho she says thats cos she is too soft..and doesn't make it clear that she is serious, and i am much better at being a scary mummy!!!

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Velvetsteph
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Postby Velvetsteph » Sat May 19, 2007 10:24 am

I think it depends on the reason for the tantrum...

Isabelle being only 13months the only type of tantrums we get at the moment is crying if she can't have something she wants - and that's all part of learning about boundries...

My plan for when she's older will depend on the reason for the tantrum - and of course how calm I am (how much sleep I've had!!)
Naieve tho' it may seem I PLAN to stay calm and talk to her/cuddle her until she stops and try and find out why e.g. tired, misunderstood, hungry, thirsty etc...

However that may all go out of the window!!

There's a great book called "how to listen so your kids will talk and talk so your kids will listen" or something which has brilliant advice on how to handle tantrums...
Worth a read.
amazon.co.uk/Talk-Kids-Will-Listen-Child/dp/1853407054/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1/202-7454658-4255004?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1179570186&sr=8-1
(just add h t t p : / / w w w . at the front)

HTH

Steph xx

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lilylover
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Postby lilylover » Sun May 20, 2007 8:45 am

Actually steph we have the same sort of tantrums. I'm currently reading in the baby whisperer how to tame your toddler and it seems to be quite good. They say when they are carrying on about something they want and they can't have you just say things such as "mummy knows you want the .... but you can't have it because.... and if they continue to get upset you ignore them until they calm down. Then you praise them for calming down and often lily just then will continue to play. And as you say the calmer you stay the easier it all is to deal with :!:

Sam...

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setierney
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Postby setierney » Sun Sep 16, 2007 10:52 am

Must say the naughty step gets used a lot in our house.
Much prefer it to smacking (controversial) or shouting (noisy!)
Seems to work (MOST of the time)

Sallx

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Velvetsteph
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Postby Velvetsteph » Sat Oct 27, 2007 9:19 pm

Velvetsteph wrote:...Isabelle being only 13months...

You know it's quite interesting to come back and read this thread 5 months later...

The main types of tantrums now are when I don't listen to her (as she sees it I'm sure!) or she can't have what she wants...

Still attempting to be the calm serene mummy but oh boy does the wingeing and whineing get on your nerves!!!! :shock:

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beck
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Postby beck » Sat Oct 27, 2007 10:20 pm

Steph I know what you mean about the whinging - I'm a no whinging or wingeing mummy I cant stand it!! I ignore it til they stop and even if I know what they want they dont get it til they calm down and ask properly.


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