still traumatised by the birth :( UPDATE

Does anyone else still get upset by a traumatic birth experience? bit down today and don't really want to go into what happened but just wondering if anyone still gets upset thinking about it? Having a good cry but feel like should be over it by now after neraly 5 months. People kept saying it would get easier but hasn't really, still very cut up. oooh feeling all sensitive and vunerable boo hoo

it's only been a very short time.
I haven't had any bad births but from people I know bad births are never far from their minds but they do say it is a distant memory, they just remember but aren't traumatised by it iykwim.
Just take it a day at a time and if things are getting on top of you ask for help whether that be help around the house or help with you emotions

I can understand where you are coming from. I still have occasional nightmares about my birth experience, which wasn't pleasant

I desperately want to have another baby, but I am scared sh*tless about giving birth again.

yep. know how you feel and dans 8 months!!
nearly died giving birth and had a horrible c-section under a general. than dan had pnuemonia and we nearly lost him.
it's never far from my thoughts.
whenever dan does something new i can't help but think it could have been very different.
but it has got easier. i don't cry about it anymore.#
probably worse for you being your first. dan was my 4 th and the other 3 births were normal.
it will get better

I really know where you are coming from. I recently I think it was on Ben's actual 18 month birthday, had a debrief with the consultant midwife at the hospital I gave birth in. It was the most useful thing I have ever done, I had counselling sessions for PND last summer (about 9 months old) but in all honesty the PND / horrible birth had been there almost since the beginning.

Strangely enough the questions I thought I wanted answering I didn't even ask, but I had all the answers I needed and also some advice IF I ever contemplated having another one, they would consider giving me special treatment ie a named mw who saw me more than once during preg, hopefully would be present for some of the labour / birth and then also be my com mw. Anyhow I found it really useful and the way to go about getting one would be to ring the hospital and ask to speak to the consultant midwife and arrange an appointment, or if you have a children's centre with an attached mw speak to them which is how I got mine. The gp was useless and had no idea this service was even on offer to anyone, but they now know.

If you wanted to share everything by posting it out, we would listen and offer it might help

Thanks for hugs everyone

I really know where you are coming from. I recently I think it was on Ben's actual 18 month birthday, had a debrief with the consultant midwife at the hospital I gave birth in. It was the most useful thing I have ever done, I had counselling sessions for PND last summer (about 9 months old) but in all honesty the PND / horrible birth had been there almost since the beginning.

Strangely enough the questions I thought I wanted answering I didn't even ask, but I had all the answers I needed and also some advice IF I ever contemplated having another one, they would consider giving me special treatment ie a named mw who saw me more than once during preg, hopefully would be present for some of the labour / birth and then also be my com mw. Anyhow I found it really useful and the way to go about getting one would be to ring the hospital and ask to speak to the consultant midwife and arrange an appointment, or if you have a children's centre with an attached mw speak to them which is how I got mine. The gp was useless and had no idea this service was even on offer to anyone, but they now know.

If you wanted to share everything by posting it out, we would listen and offer it might help

well I had a post natal app with hospital last week and they couldnt do it because they have lost my notes so another one tomorrow but tbh i have got no idea what to expect? I have also got my nae on the waiting list for psychotherapy. God it sounds awful writing that but I really need help with it all. I cried so much today about it my eyes are sore, will update tomorrow thanks annette

:hug: I can understand where you are coming from. I still have occasional nightmares about my birth experience, which wasn't pleasant

I desperately want to have another baby, but I am scared sh*tless about giving birth again.

me too thats why i am going for therapy to get heealed before we plan any more but i am also scared of the dentist now and going for a smear basically i just dont want anyone touching me!

Thanks for hugs everyone

well I had a post natal app with hospital last week and they couldnt do it because they have lost my notes

WTF?!?!?!
That's disgraceful - sounds like you need to put in an official complaint too...

Massive massive hugs - it took me around 2years to get over Isabelle's birth... I don't think it was really fully resolved until I had Grace!

no advice really just sending hugs. I had a straightforward rapid delivery with Blake but for months and months after I would wake up having terrible flashbacks and would be really frightened. I have no idea why? I hope that the psychotherapy and seeing your notes helps.

for all of you. xx