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Getting baby to sleep

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lazylexis
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Getting baby to sleep

Postby lazylexis » Sat Nov 07, 2009 6:29 pm

The only way i seem to be able to get nathan to sleep is either feeding him or pushing in buggy or walking around in the sling,nothing else works,he just screams for ages and i feed him.dh is trying to get him to sleep tonight and all i can hear is screaming.dh is walking about rocking him.don't want to do controlled crying but not sure what else to try.have got the no cry sleep solution book but he just screams straight away unless he's feeding.help!
I went out for the evening last weekend and even pushed in buggy he screamed for 40 mins with dh before falling asleep.
Any suggestions?.he won't have a dummy but will sometimes fall asleep in bed with me without feeding.

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eviesmummy
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby eviesmummy » Sat Nov 07, 2009 6:32 pm

Perhaps try taking off your top and (if it will fit) get dh to wear it or to put it over his shoulder where Nathan is laying, the smell of you might be enough comfort to help him settle?

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beffys
Cloth Nappy Disciple
Cloth Nappy Disciple

Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby beffys » Sat Nov 07, 2009 7:51 pm

I can't offer any helpful suggestions as Ella fed to sleep until that stopped working and then it was only once she weaned completely DH starting putting her down at night, well after the point she wouldn't feed to sleep anymore. I just fed her to sleep because it was easier that way and felt the most natural way for us to do it what with all the sleep inducing properties in BM. The smelling thing is a good idea though. We tended to co-sleep and the smell idea worked well getting Ella to sleep in her cot when we wanted her to or I'd have something like a sheet or soft toy I'd slept with myself and put it in her bed then. We just had to work around Ella as it was easier that way and I don't like crying so I always put her down in the first year. If she gets upset with her Dad it'll get to a point still that I can't handle and I'll insist on taking over.

Can't blame baby though for making a fuss cos he wants cozy, yummy mummy to nuzzle and grab hold of compared to Daddy really though. To some extent he still is an extension of you in the first 9 months or so and will react if separated, but then it's really down to temperament as well. Some babies are so chilled and content, whereas Ella was always very attached in her first year and always suited co-sleeping. I think there's tips in the no cry sleep solution about getting DH to help, etc. I found much as the suggestions in the book made sense, that Ella wasn't ready for them and her independence just came on naturally where she was developmentally ready at her own pace it just happened. It was useful doing the sleep diary and actually noticing the natural change and improvement after a month, 3 months, 6 months, etc.

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Velvetsteph
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby Velvetsteph » Sat Nov 07, 2009 7:52 pm

Have you looked into the various forms of reflux? :?

Does he sleep on his front or back?

With Grace I feed her to sleepy (but not asleep) then put her down on her front and if she's wiggley I patt her back (and sometimes pat her back and bottom alternately with each hand) and sshhhh or sing close to her ear (e.g. twinkle twinkle)...
The patting is quite fast (but not hard) to start with and gets gentler as she settles...

During the day loud Iron Maiden works a treat :giggle: but that's not for bedtime...

It does sound like he's over tired (Grace is a MENACE to get to sleep if that happens) - have you tried winding down slowly and putting him to bed earlier?
One of the mistakes we used to make with Isabelle was waiting until she was desperate for sleep and then just putting her straight to bed - no wind-down, story, song, bath, nothing... We had dreadful battles with her... (didn't help that she was in pain with reflux and we didn't know enough to get it treated)...

If he screams when you put him down pick him up and cuddle/settle, put down and just repeat until he's calmer...

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indigosky2k
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby indigosky2k » Sat Nov 07, 2009 7:57 pm

TBH I'm having similar problems with Kacie at the mo. She's got into the habit of feeding to sleep and needs her dummy sticking straight in when she comes off. I think this is contributing to our unsettled nights. Sorry hun no advice, but hoping others do. :hug: 's

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lazylexis
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby lazylexis » Sat Nov 07, 2009 8:39 pm

steph- he likes to sleep on his front but will only sleep for max 3 hours at a time.if I put him down even semi awake he'll cry. last night tho he did open his eyes as I put him down and went back to sleep.we tried patting and ssshing but he was still awake ad crying after 30 mins and took 2 hours to settle even trying to feed him again.we struggle with daytime naps too and they are all over the place some days, he does seem to sleep better if he's slept better during the day but with visiting mum etc the routine is a bit tits up ATM and doesn't look like things will get better now mums home as I need to be there a lot to help.if nathan falls asleep in car or buggy he's guaranteed to wake up when you try and move him.

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Soupdragon
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby Soupdragon » Sat Nov 07, 2009 8:52 pm

:hug: :hug: :hug:

Iris' sleeping habits have always been dreadful. But it does get better! :hug: I think when Iris was around Nathan's age is when I really started to feel desperate and fed up and like it would never end. I found a comforter did help Iris; we have a little blankie from Cloth Bums R Us that has been such a lifesaver. We actually have 3, in case 1 goes walkabout. Iris used to nurse to sleep at night, but a campaign of patting and reassurance gradually worked for us. It took a long time, but sleep techniques worked; it's not CC or nothing. I started out by just popping Iris in the cot awake, but sleepy, then reassuring and picking up, putting down, shushing and patting. Over time, I was able to move away from the cot, constantly reassuring, until I was able to leave the room and shush from outside. This took a few weeks of effort; moving another step away from the cot every few days, IYSWIM. Iris still nursed to sleep for daytime naps until about 2 weeks ago. Then I just started holding her to sleep, which I still do. It takes less than 10 minutes these days to get her to sleep. And, at night times, she's more than happy to be put in her cot wide awake and go to sleep on her own, with me downstairs. It works for us and I don't care whether I'm meant to be holding her or whether I should have fed her to sleep for 17 months. If it works for you, it works. :wink: So no great advice - a comforter may help. But it will get better. :hug:

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tanya
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby tanya » Sat Nov 07, 2009 9:06 pm

I know I've said this before, but I find consistency ois the key.

We spent quite a while getting Bella's routine sorted (pretty much dictated by her, but reinforced by us IYSWIM). We just observed when she prefered to eat, sleep, play etc and built a routine around that. We also introduced the EASY routine from Baby Whisperer, which tries to seperate eating from sleeping to make sure that association is broken.

Even if it means staying at home for a few days, it may be worth trying to get him into some kind of consistent routine throughout the day and may help him settle a bit more, day and night.

Once he's settled into a routine, it becomes easier to flex it for activities etc, but as long as it follows the same pattern (even if not the same timing), he should remain settled.

If you'd like to see if the Baby Whisperer would work for you, I am happy to send you my copy of the book.

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Velvetsteph
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Re: Getting baby to sleep

Postby Velvetsteph » Sat Nov 07, 2009 10:00 pm

lazylexis wrote:steph- he likes to sleep on his front but will only sleep for max 3 hours at a time.if I put him down even semi awake he'll cry. last night tho he did open his eyes as I put him down and went back to sleep.we tried patting and ssshing but he was still awake ad crying after 30 mins and took 2 hours to settle even trying to feed him again.we struggle with daytime naps too and they are all over the place some days, he does seem to sleep better if he's slept better during the day but with visiting mum etc the routine is a bit tits up ATM and doesn't look like things will get better now mums home as I need to be there a lot to help.if nathan falls asleep in car or buggy he's guaranteed to wake up when you try and move him.

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Grace used to go 5hrs at night but now it's usually max 3hrs at a time too :roll: but she's full of cold right now so I'm not pushing the issue...
Plus babies are supposed to wake at night for feeds... (not what you want to hear though I'm sure!!)

And I've never successfully transferred a child or baby from carseat/buggy to bed...

Honestly the main reason babies wake from their sleep early is discomfort... Whether it's hunger, wet nappy, cold etc...

:hug: :hug:

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