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I'm a bit Bemused

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jennyjanesharp
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I'm a bit Bemused

Postby jennyjanesharp » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:36 am

Ok, so I need some reassurance big time ladies!
I was sitting in tesco cafe waiting for DH when a woman took it upon herself to chat to me (that part was not rude!). She 1st comment on how Huge I look (im only 22 weeks pregnant), and then preoceeded to heed and warm me of the perils of having a young toddler and baby, how hard it was going to be, that i must be incredibly brave, and that i'll be exhausted.

:cry:

I thought i was coping quite ok with being :pregnant: and having a 14 mth old, and yes i have HUGE concerns about how the hell im going to cope with a newie and a 18mth old, and was of the opinion that what will be will be and that i'd just get on with it.

Am i being naive?

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babygrowbelly
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby babygrowbelly » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:41 am

i don't know as I only have one 9.5mths, but contemplating another, however people like this really annoy me!! I can imagine it will be hard but why should a stranger feel the need to tell you this when you are already pregnant?? Also, parenting skills differ from person to person so she may find it really tough whereas you on the otherhand may find it a breeze (perhaps that is wishful thinking? :giggle: )

I would ignore people who feel the need to tell you how tough it will be, you will only know when it happens.


I know people who have a large and small gap between children and both have plus points :wink:

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Annette
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby Annette » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:42 am

Some people need to learn to keep their comments to themselves. I don't think you are naive at all. Having a newborn and other children of any age is sometimes difficult but certainly not impossible. Charlotte was a little older when Ben was born and yes I had some problems but I don't think it would have made any difference had she been even older than that. Being a mum is a hard job but also very rewarding - enjoy it :D

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northernruth
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby northernruth » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:44 am

Sorry, but what a rude cow. How dare she????

I'm sure you know it could be hard (and no doubt will be at times) but you've no way of knowing now what the baby will be like sleep wise etc - my mate had a LO when her first was 16 months and she has been fine, another mate had TWINS when her little boy was 20 months and again she has breezed through it. Yes I'm sure you will be tired but with your attitude (which sounds spot on by the way - you'll just deal with it at the time) I'm sure you'll be fine

Don't take any notice of her - concentrate on looking forward to your lovely baby on the way. A close age gap will mean that your eldest will get used to the newbie soon, and they're not little for long

:hug: you should have told her where to go!!!

babygrowbelly wrote:
I know people who have a large and small gap between children and both have plus points :wink:


WSS - I think families just have a way of working themselves out, in the end it will just be how your family is, age gaps don't really matter one way or the other IMHO

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VICKERSHOUSE
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby VICKERSHOUSE » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:48 am

You'll do fine hun :D Keep positive and think about the fun of having double fluffy bums :giggle:

I have 2 years between my middle two and found it much easier than the 4 year gap between the first two :shock:
No having to get the baby up and ready in time to get the older one to school !

I don't think it really matters what gap you have between children - there will always be hard times for loads of different reasons :hug:

Some people really should learn to keep their comments to themselves :x

Nancy xx

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Chooky
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby Chooky » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:55 am

trust your instincts and you will be fine. My SIL has about 15 months between her LOs.She is a SAHM with 3 kids and her DH works in the mines so is away weeks at a time. She copes very well! I think for some people if you have your mind in the right place you will cope better!
northernruth wrote:Sorry, but what a rude cow. How dare she????

I'm sure you know it could be hard (and no doubt will be at times) but you've no way of knowing now what the baby will be like sleep wise etc - my mate had a LO when her first was 16 months and she has been fine, another mate had TWINS when her little boy was 20 months and again she has breezed through it. Yes I'm sure you will be tired but with your attitude (which sounds spot on by the way - you'll just deal with it at the time) I'm sure you'll be fine

Don't take any notice of her - concentrate on looking forward to your lovely baby on the way. A close age gap will mean that your eldest will get used to the newbie soon, and they're not little for long

:hug: you should have told her where to go!!!

babygrowbelly wrote:
I know people who have a large and small gap between children and both have plus points :wink:


WSS - I think families just have a way of working themselves out, in the end it will just be how your family is, age gaps don't really matter one way or the other IMHO


WTS :wink:

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beck
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby beck » Wed Feb 24, 2010 9:59 am

how rude of her! Theres 16 months between Phe and Will and I love the age gap. When they are both so young often they nap together and now that they are abit older they are the best of friends :wine:

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JanX
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby JanX » Wed Feb 24, 2010 10:28 am

:roll: :roll:

I used to get things like that ALL the time when I was pg! L was 12 months when I got my BFP, by 20 weeks pg with the twins I looked full term so used to get all the 'oohhh, you must be ready to drop any day now' comments..

I got a heck of a lot of 'How are you going to cope?' type stuff, and it was even worse from people who knew I was expecting twins but weren't friends (iyswim).

One woman from my aquanatal class actually told me that if she found she was pg with twins with such a young child already she would kill herself :shock: :shock: :shock:

L was 21 months old when the girls were born, and yes, it was a challenge, but worth every minute. The good time by far outweighed (and still do) the bad!

Jan x

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Kirstyh
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Re: I'm a bit Bemused

Postby Kirstyh » Wed Feb 24, 2010 2:49 pm

:shock: :shock:
Not read all your replies but I would have slapped her, we have 16 months between Kieran and Anna and it was no bother at all, never once did we think what the hell have we done, I did get "ahh have you had a wee accident" when I was pregnant, ermm no we did plan it that way!

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