hf1

Should I be worried?

My avatar
pinksalmon2001
Sucker for Cloth Nappies
Sucker for Cloth Nappies

Should I be worried?

Postby pinksalmon2001 » Tue May 25, 2010 8:01 pm

Tyler has been showing all the signs of a lot of obsessive behaviour lately and i'm not sure if it is just 'normal' toddler behaviour or if it is something more :-?

Examples are:
He likes things (everything) to be done in a certain order or particular way - he helps me put the washing in, he shuts the washing machine door, goes to the cupboard and points at the powder, then points at the fabric softner, he pushes the drawer shut and then points at the dial. Today I put a nappy wash in so no fabric softner and he had an absolute meltdown because I wouldn't use the fabric softner :shock:

When he has cereal for breakfast he has to put the cereal in the bowl, then he passes me the milk, then he points at the sink for me to drain the milk away - today I tried to give him his cereal with the milk and he screamed until I emptied it.

He is also becoming very very independent and won't let me help with anything at all. He won't let me open cereal bars or put puzzles together unless he decides he wants my help.

There is obviously lots more but they are just a few examples but if things aren't done in the way he wants we have screaming tantrums and throwing himself around, I also get this if I don't understand what he is trying to tell me quickly enough :(

My avatar
nappynutter
Cloth Nappy Fanatic
Cloth Nappy Fanatic

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby nappynutter » Tue May 25, 2010 8:04 pm

He's trying to control his environment and make his own choices which can be completely normal for toddlers but can also be a sign of an ASD. If you don't have any other worries about him then I would assume it's just a normal phase.

My avatar
twinkletot
Cloth Nappy Disciple
Cloth Nappy Disciple

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby twinkletot » Tue May 25, 2010 8:08 pm

I think it's all a normal stage, Nathan went through (and still is) the same sort of thing :hug: :hug: He likes to help me with the washing and knows what 'comes next'. If I don't let him do certain bits he gets in a paddy about it. He had massive tamtrums while trying to make himself understood too. A lot of that is frustration I am sure. Nathan now just repeats words over and over until you understand what he is saying.

My avatar
monsterm
Cloth Nappy Worshipper
Cloth Nappy Worshipper

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby monsterm » Tue May 25, 2010 8:09 pm

nappynutter wrote:He's trying to control his environment and make his own choices which can be completely normal for toddlers but can also be a sign of an ASD. If you don't have any other worries about him then I would assume it's just a normal phase.


WSS Wanting to become independent at his age is perfectly normal. The wanting to do things in a certain order can be a sign of something more but it comes with other signs so if there is nothing else you are worried about I wouldn't be worried

My avatar
pinksalmon2001
Sucker for Cloth Nappies
Sucker for Cloth Nappies

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby pinksalmon2001 » Tue May 25, 2010 8:21 pm

nappynutter wrote:He's trying to control his environment and make his own choices which can be completely normal for toddlers but can also be a sign of an ASD. If you don't have any other worries about him then I would assume it's just a normal phase.


I don't think I have any other worries, I am part of another private forum where all the babies were born around the same time and are all having similar frustration tantrums so I know that part of his behaviour is normal. The desperate need to be so independent is driving me crazy though. The obsessiveness/routined behaviour is the only thing that worries me in any way. I'm not sure whether I am just reading too much into it :-?

My avatar
pinksalmon2001
Sucker for Cloth Nappies
Sucker for Cloth Nappies

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby pinksalmon2001 » Tue May 25, 2010 8:43 pm

I guess I am also struggling to decide/know where 'normal' toddler behaviour ends and something more begins :(

My avatar
ladybird
Cloth Nappy Aficionado
Cloth Nappy Aficionado

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby ladybird » Tue May 25, 2010 8:50 pm

That sounds pretty normal to me. All 3 of mine have been through phases of it and come out again.

My avatar
twinkletot
Cloth Nappy Disciple
Cloth Nappy Disciple

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby twinkletot » Tue May 25, 2010 8:52 pm

Honestly? At the moment I would say it is normal toddler behaviour. If it continues when he is 3/4/5 then it may be cause for concern. They (as a rule) won't test for ASD under 5 as a lot of children grow out of the behaviour and it is more apparent at that age that it is not 'just' toddler behaviour and something more deep rooted.

My avatar
Amanda
Cloth Nappy Worshipper
Cloth Nappy Worshipper

Re: Should I be worried?

Postby Amanda » Tue May 25, 2010 8:58 pm

Connor was very much like this and is just about coming out of it, he can accept less strict routine now, but can still have almighty tantrums if things don't go as he wanted/expected. I was also worried about it, but later this was combined with things like poor social skills, not liking body contact and noticing numerical patterns in things amongst others. I spoke to my HV and she said it all falls in the range of normal but possibly borderline Aspergers. We decided not to go through any assessment until we see how he settles in to school though. I don't have the same concerns about Finn regarding sociability, empathy, body contact, etc and yet he's now moved into the phase of wanting everything done a certain way or risk meltdown. So I'm pretty sure it's a case of wanting to exert some independence in a world where pretty much everything is done for them, rather than anything else.

Next

Return to Baby and Toddler