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Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

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Cyrillia
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Cyrillia » Wed Jul 27, 2011 7:35 am

Thanks for thinking about us. We're not doing too badly - the boys are being quite good in the main, but it's only Tuesday and DH was home yesterday afternoon so I can't really say how things are. I did get them out yesterday morning, so that advice definitely did help me avoid some of the noise! I've ordered them some wellies and waterproofs so that we can continue to do that whatever the weather. :D

I've spoken to DH too, and have explained that I need help as one thing that's not helping is that we have a lot of really steep steps leading to our house - they turn corners twice too (if that makes sense), and I just can't get a buggy up and down them. With Rory only being 18m it's just a nightmare, so DH has said I can order myself a new sling to try to get one that's more supportive so that I can actually get out of the house. :D

I am just feeling so rotten and low - I've just rung up this morning for an appointment with the doctor to try to talk to them about my medication. I'm just sick of it as I just want to enjoy my boys! I think this is our biggest problem really, as I just don't want to do anything at all. I've only been out of bed for 30 minutes and already I just want to lie on the settee. The thought of having to move to do breakfast just makes me want to scream. That's just not right. :cry:

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littlesez
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby littlesez » Wed Jul 27, 2011 7:36 am

yeh its not right to feel so low so going to docs is a good move hope you get some help pm if you need to chat meds xx

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Miss_Purple
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Miss_Purple » Wed Jul 27, 2011 7:50 am

littlesez wrote:yeh its not right to feel so low so going to docs is a good move hope you get some help pm if you need to chat xx

WSS, also the sling sounds a great idea x

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Velvetsteph
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Velvetsteph » Wed Jul 27, 2011 10:09 am

Hope the GP can help as I think if you are happier the kids will be too - I recognise not wanting to move from the sofa...

have you tried not going online until after breakfast and at least one chore is done e.g. Filling the washing machine... Also try and eat breakfast with the kiddies :)

Keep posting, you will come out the other side with the right support :hug:

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gayleygoo
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby gayleygoo » Wed Jul 27, 2011 12:30 pm

:hug: :hug: I can understand how you feel too, it's been ages since I had a proepr play with my kids, there always just seems to be so much else to do, it's easier to let them wander around the house while I get on with things but they want attention quite badly and then I get annoyed because they don't give me a moment's peace :oops: the local park is 40mins walk away, and town is even further, so we don't get out that much and there's certainly no nature to speak of within walking distance! I find it's much harder with two (or more) children, just when I sit down to read to or play with Molly, Daragh will demand something else. Vice versa. It's much more effort to get out of the house, and it's stressful shopping with both. Lately I've felt like I just really want a job, anywhere except at home with the kids as it's so repetitive, a bit boring, and exhausting :( but I need to change that.

Maybe coming up with a rough plan for the next day would help? Organise breakfast things, clothes to put on, and pack a going out bag just in case. Have an activity sitting ready to do once breakfast is cleared away. Give the kiddies as much to do for themselves, and to help you, as you can. Then maybe have story time, or a few rhymes, maybe a bit of chasing or hide and seek. If you've all had a nice morning, maybe your afternons will be easier managed.

I hope the meds make a difference to your mood as well, it's so hard to do anything when you're feeling down :hug:

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Cyrillia
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Cyrillia » Wed Jul 27, 2011 3:23 pm

Thanks all, I did stop posting before when I got really low, but I won't this time as I don't want to feel so lonely. I know I'm not the only one in this situation, and that makes me feel a bit better too - not that there are lots of you out there also feeling rotten though, if that makes sense - just that I'm not the only one who is struggling with this and small little ones. I'm just so desperately sad for them that I'm their mammy. I never wanted things to be this way, and I am scared that I'm going to turn around in no time to find that they're grown up and gone and I'll have missed it all by sitting here in this funk.

I went to the doctors this afternoon but there wasn't much he could do. There's one option, but that could cause other problems for me, so I'm going to really have a good think and chat with DH about.

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Cadiva
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Cadiva » Wed Jul 27, 2011 5:31 pm

mummy_goose1 wrote:Its sooooo easy to fall into the trap of looking and worrying about other mums and their children. but i bet u any amount of money that if u were actually to tell them-they'd say that they were thinking the same about u!


Too true. The best piece of advice I got about having a child was "don't compare what anyone else is doing" because that way just lies trouble. See what other people do with their kids, use it as inspiration but don't worry if you don't do the same.

Someone else once said to me that the best thing for any child is to know they are loved and that can be anything from saying it to spending 10 minutes with them doing whatever it is they want to do, be it running round shouting like a looney or pretending to be a fish (etc).

We try play with James when we're cooped up at home but, as we have no outside space at all, it can be a lot harder trying to occupy him. He is a brilliant child for self entertaining though but as long as he knows me or the OH are about to do something with him or for him when he wants then he's generally happy.
The thing he loves best though is just being outside and running about so we often pack ourselves off to the park so he can just run and run.

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Miss_Purple
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Miss_Purple » Wed Jul 27, 2011 5:44 pm

I do find it really hard to get out of the house at the weekends even though I'm up and out by 9am during the week for work. The difference is definitely how organised I am the night before. I'd try just to do one small thing each day, maybe build a den with a sheet and clothes airer, or just fill some bowls with water and splash about in them, just aim for 30 mins at a time, hopefully you'll find something you can enjoy too and it will start to get easier xxx

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Gladys
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Re: Advice needed please - grizzling/unhappy kids.

Postby Gladys » Wed Jul 27, 2011 6:01 pm

I'm just so desperately sad for them that I'm their mammy

You're obviously a fantastic mam who cares very much and wants to be there for her children. I've been thinking of you too and I just thought I should send you some love. :love: :hug:

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